Thursday, October 15, 2009

Thursday 15th October 2009….a little personal writing

I was awakened this morning at 7.30am with friend informing me of a memorial service taking place this morning at 11am of an old referee colleague.

John DaSilva was a fiery old Portuguese man I met when I became involved in refereeing here in Nanaimo about 12 years ago.  John was in his late 70’s then and the only man I met who had a passion for this game equalled to my own.  We became friends and I admired his dedication to the youth of this sport.

I must admit I did not know he had been sick for a while and passed away last week.  I was happy and proud to be at his service which was held in the Bethlehem Retreat in Nanaimo.  The service was a good “sending off” ( a referee term) for John but I want to describe the Chapel.

The location is set on Westwood Lake, a beautiful lake at the base of Mount Benson and the view out of the chapel window was of the lake,  the high trees in the back ground with the clouds filtering through, a truly splendid send off for John.

Now it gets personal……as I mentioned John was born in Portugal and he even bears the same surname of my ex-wife’s family whom I met in Bermuda.  So I got to thinking about my life and how I left England and my family as a young immature youth of 21 years old to go the other side of the world.  I think my Mum was so very happy for me but also so sad to be seeing me gone.

My next thoughts were of my own Mum’s and then my Dad’s services.  At John’s service today his Grandson, a man of about 25 years spoke.  It was very hard for him and he broke down many times during his speech, which made it all the more special.

I was privileged to give the eulogy at both my parent’s services and I remember the hours I pondered over what to say and how to say it.  The celebrations were totally different…at my Mum’s I was very confident, clear and quite unemotional and to this day I have never shed a tear for my Mum.  I am not quite sure what to make of this because she was the finest woman I have ever met and we had a beautiful and very loving relationship.  For my Dad it was different, the speech was laced with humour but I remember lumps in my throat through out.  Dad and I had talked many times about when that day would arrive for him and his wishes and I know he was at peace.  I miss them both very much.

I also remember the last time I was at the Bethlehem Retreat it was about 8 years ago and again for a friend’s funeral service.  I remember at this time I was in a relationship and we had a fight in the car on the way and how we were through the service.  How stupid and sad of me,  of course I realize that now.

I also thought about the new relationship Sara and I are embarking upon and how so sweet it is, she is one amazing woman and I feel so lucky.

So there you have it quite a roller coaster of a morning.

The afternoon saw me reffing another high school soccer game, then a quick bite to eat and off to a class put on by the local Recreation department and it is about digital cameras.  I hope to learn how to take night photos. 

Then out to the airport for 8.30pm to pick up Eileen from her trip up north.  So a busy day…leave you with a nice photo of Sara and some of the children on the reservation in Kyuquot.Sara in Kyuquot

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